You will quit jobs, probably several. How you leave follows you longer than you’d expect. The manager you’re leaving might be your manager again three jobs from now, and the HR person you’re emailing might work at your next company. This is the order I’d do it in.
Before you say anything
- Have the new offer in writing and signed, with the background check and reference checks cleared. A verbal yes is not an offer.
- Check what leaving costs you. Find the date your bonus pays out, the date your 401(k) match vests and any stock grants coming due. Leaving two weeks before a vesting date can cost you thousands.
- Find out what happens to unused vacation. Some states require employers to pay it out and many don’t. Your handbook and your state labor department’s website will say.
- Check when your health insurance ends. Coverage often runs through the end of the month you leave, so a last day of the 30th and a last day of the 1st can be a month apart. If there’s a gap before new coverage starts, COBRA lets you keep your current plan at full price. You usually have 60 days to sign up, and coverage reaches back to the day the old plan ended.
- Read your agreement for a notice period, a non-compete or a non-solicitation clause. If anything there worries you, an hour with an employment lawyer is worth paying for.
- Download what’s yours: pay stubs, benefits details, your 401(k) login. Access to the HR portal disappears fast. Don’t take company files or client lists. That’s the quickest way to turn a clean exit into a legal one.
Telling them
Tell your manager first, live, on video if you’re remote. Keep it short. You don’t owe a full explanation, and this isn’t the moment for feedback. Something like:
I wanted you to hear it from me first. I’ve accepted another offer, and my last day will be October 9. I’ve really valued working with you, and I want to make the handover easy.
Send the letter the same day. A few lines will do:
Dear [manager], please accept this as notice of my resignation from my position as [title]. My last day will be [date]. Thank you for the past [time here]. I’m grateful for what I’ve learned, and I’ll do what I can to hand my work over smoothly. Best, [you]
Two weeks’ notice is the norm in the US for most jobs, though your contract may say otherwise. Most US jobs are at-will, which cuts both ways: some employers will thank you and make today your last day. It isn’t common, but have a little cash set aside in case your last paycheck comes sooner than planned.
The counteroffer
If they offer more money to stay, take a day before you answer, and think about why you started looking. If it was only the pay, it might be worth hearing out. If it was the manager, the work or the hours, a raise doesn’t fix that, and now everyone knows you had one foot out the door.
The last two weeks
- Write a handover document: what you own, where each piece stands, who to call and where the files live. Your replacement will read it, and so will the manager writing your reference.
- Hand over passwords through IT or the team’s password manager, never in a chat message.
- Ask two or three people you trust if you can list them as references, and get their personal email addresses.
- In the exit interview, be useful rather than cathartic. Pick one or two specific, fixable things. Save the rest for your friends.
Your old 401(k)
You can usually leave it where it is, roll it into your new employer’s plan, or roll it into an IRA. Don’t cash it out. If you’re under 59½, you’ll typically owe income tax plus a 10% penalty, and the money stops being retirement money. Small balances may be moved for you automatically, so watch your mail. Which option is best depends on fees and investment choices, and any of them beats spending it.
On your last day, send a short goodbye email with a personal way to reach you. Then go. You don’t have to love a place to leave it well.